The Meaning
“Mind’s Eye/Out of the Earth” came unexpectedly during a time of great struggle inside me. I had great doubts of ever getting out of it. I did not really understand where I was going with this painting but later I understood that it was about God transforming my darkness into light.
Blood and Fire
At the bottom we see the earth with smoke coming up out of it, forming into a dark cloud above, and then my torso and head is coming up out of that. The fire in my stomach metaphorically demonstrates the trials of life I am going through, and the blood pouring down from that symbolizes the blood of Christ.
Spiritual Insight
I have a tattoo of a cross on my arm with the same symbolism and there is an eye in the middle of the cross and in my forehead indicating another new spiritual insight that I have been given to understand what is doing inside of me and why.
Mind’s Eye/Out of the Earth Vision
Inside the eyeball in my forehead is fire representing the passion of God’s love for me and as His blood drips down out of it as well. Above the eye comes a vision through His sacrifice.
There is a symbol of eternity and then rings of fire (which go up to the top of the painting) which are symbols for the stages of spiritual transformation. Next up from that is a heart of love for me which I see after going through suffering for a while and now I can relate back to His suffering for me.
Up from the heart is a freedom bell expressing my desire to be liberated from my past broken relationships and issues. Then a dove symbolizes His Spirit which then leads me on to the next level of trials and then transformation.
Formative Web of Lies
Next up from the dove is a male symbol with a jagged bloody edge running through it and drips on a skull and bones (on the right) and a noose, bat, and spider’s web (on the left). The web symbolizes the lies I got caught in early on in my formative and early childhood years. The bat symbolizes the darkness and lack of spiritual understanding inside those lies and the bloody spider represents the poison in my bloodline coming from my ancestors.
Up from that, I experience a whole other level of spiritual warfare inside of me and see that there is a grim reaper with a sickle and demons fighting against God’s angels on the other side.
Electrical Storm
As I pass through another level up through a ring of fire, I see my body parts with bones sticking out of them. To the right of them I see a Sacred Heart with thorns around it and electrical currents come out of it to touch and heal me and to make me whole for the first time.
Above the next ring of fire is my head in distress with bloodshot eyes with three flying eyeballs symbolizing vision to perceive The Trinity of God with lanterns around them illuminating my mind to understand the different expressions of love through Him.
River Revealing Hope
Through the next ring of fire above, there is a waterfall trickling down representing the refreshing flow of the Spirit and the rose on the left expresses the beautiful result of experiencing that.
To the left of the rose, there are cacti and an owl, to remind me of all the times I have wandered alone in the desert and the have experienced the death of my soul looking for redemption and help in the world around me.
On the right, there is a cow skull and broken clock bleeding to show the similar death of my soul in childhood, adolescence and young adulthood that was lost in time.
Through the next ring of fire there are palm trees and a river revealing hope and a better future which leads to paradise. Three ghostly animated characters are playing music in heaven because they are finally free from the burdens they had to carry when living on the earth.
This painting is most closely related to another piece I did ten years later, named “Carrying the New.”
The Process
This piece was done during one of the most intense, saddest, and depressing times of my life and it amazed me that I even finished it. I had such wicked lower back spasms at the time that I had to lay down on my sofa with a heating pad on it to sketch and paint it. I had all my paints, brushes, and mineral spirits right next to me on a coffee table and I eventually learned how to paint lying down flat on my back for many weeks and months.
Inspiration came from lyrics by musicians such as Alice Cooper who describe dark visions such as this one but I like to illustrate the hopeful side of the light which I see coming out of the darkness.